Well hello, Hipsters! What’s new?
Same old, same old?
Yeah, it figures. How’s that beard doing?
Uneventful like most of what you do?
Sure. Hey, we’ve brought you something –
A razor and a change of clothes.
Hey, no, stop it right there – this is not a hate Hipster post. We’re just a bit overwhelmed with the hipster drama, and we feel like it’s time they dropped the mic.
For the past two years (give or take), hipsters have been everywhere, doing everything and nothing, challenging norms and setting those of their own. And while, at first, we were absolutely mesmerized with these bearded fellas and their tattooed sleeves, at this point – it’s all gotten old. The whole thing. Just as it happens with most (if not all) trends out there, this one too became too much (although not too soon), unnecessarily.
Hipsters got so overwhelming that we’ve turned them into catch-all scapegoats, guilty for everything, even the things they have nothing to do with.
The beer’s too expensive? Blame the hipsters.
The government is messing it all up. Down with the hipsters!
They served me tea in a jar? It’s those crazy hipsters, again.
Global warming’s going to the extreme? Hipsters.
They made me sit on a wooden pallet in a restaurant? Yeap, that’s hipsters for yah.
No one has yet blamed hipsters for the disappearance of Malaysia Airlines flight 370 or the sinking of Titanic, but we have a feeling that’s just a matter of time.
It’s a coping mechanism, what can we say.
Fashion cults are nothing new but this hipster one was exceptionally overwhelming and somewhat dull.
The sameness of hipster expression got so tiring that, at one point, we’d walk down the streets and see merely ten guys dressed the same, walking the same, dragging the same accessories around, thinking they are different. Some of them were carrying lemonade jars, too – flipping their iPhones around for a good selfie angle. Some originality, please?
What’s even more troubling is that the hipster trend started spreading onto neighboring male trends. For instance, hipster brother-trend lumberjack got so many of the hipster genes we sometimes have difficulties differentiating the two! Terrible.
What started off as a reaction and rebellion to the dullness of typical male fashion, turned into a movement special for, well, nothing. We’ve seen it happen a million times – different becomes the same the moment it starts being exercised by the masses. It overpowers and bores, with no salvation.
Without any humor or bite — hipsters stand in front of the wardrobe for an age every morning to end up wearing random combinations of clothes that are as exciting as boiled potatoes. Unlike male smart casual outfits that are timeless and chic in their own right (and do tolerate and call for upgrades in form of accessories, beards and everything else in between), hipsters dress like nerdy kids without getting the grades, or contributing life in any way. Could you ever really take a hipster seriously? Ouch!
Trying Too Hard
Seemingly blasé to everything around them, hipsters have made it their primary occupation to look a certain way, advocate a disconnect to material possessions and emphasize their target thought called “just living life”. Ridiculous. The fact they are collectively investing so much energy into rocking the hipster mood is precisely why we’ve gotten into the disapproving mode. We’re onto you, people – for a while now.
Where integrity lacks, disapproval finds home. Sorry.
The End of An Era
Well, not an era per se, but the end – and we hope a swift one.
Guys, you have hit peak beard; you’ve had your fun with all the short, narrow trousers, studiously thought-out socks and checkered or unicorn-patterned shirts. We tolerated your (hot pink) Victorian beards and the shaven sides to your heads… and the buns, too.
Hipsters, it was really cool until it wasn’t, so maybe it’s time you vacate the premises. We’ll donate for razors and style guides, just ask. We’re good people.
Greetings from everyone, ever.
Peter is a men’s lifestyle writer at High Street Gent magazine. Beside writing he worked as a menswear consultant for many fashion events around UK & Europe.
Follow Peter on Twitter for more men’s fashion tips.